Recently I realized that children fall into at least four categories - depending on the reason why they are born or based upon the way they are parented later.
The trophy child like a trophy wife, is the child one has for the status it brings along. Much like how a just divorced and quoted to be impotent man or an infertile woman finds the fastest and quickest way(s) to have a baby... just to prove the point - nothing more and nothing else. For them, the child is nothing more than a showpiece - parents seem attached to this child yet more for self-obsessed reasons than anything else - to create envy among the snoopy ex and/or to shut slanderous mouths and as a proof for their own active sex life. These are children one 'has to' have.
The token child on the other hand, is more like a child/children one has for the very heck of it. Much like how one has one for the very reason that one 'must' have at least one; or when 'more the number of kids, more the verility', is assumed to be true by absurd personalities in some even absurd societies.
Here, it is all about the numbers. How many girls? - this in case it is in the North Eastern part of India, How many boys? - this applies to the rest of India. The token child in many marriages is just born out of no reason at all; with no purpose and of little value. It is like a token exchanged to evade the stigma it might bring otherwise. Born out of the duties performed connected with marriage (including having a child) and raised as a duty connected therewith thereafter. These are children one 'must' have.
The accidental child, like the name suggests, is born out of what the parents might see as a "mistake" including (yet not limited to,) a goof-up while trying to use protection or being too drunk and/or carried away to not use one. These are re-creations made by mistakes during recreations - a foolish one to regret for the rest of the life.
Or these could also be the ones a person is pushed to have not as a matter of choice yet one that rises out of force and compulsion like in the event of a rape or as a matter of tradition (like in the case of a child born to a Devadasi). These children carry the burns and scars and the damage more than the parents. These are children one knows not 'why s/he has'.
The love child on the other hand, is born out of love. A symbol of trust, care and respect that the parents have for each other. This child carries with it the genes and the energy that created it in the first place and enchants others with its very presence. Unlike the other two, these are passionate children who are easy to love and fun to be with. Not just made out of skin and bones, these are children with a heart and soul. Rare yet the most sought after.
Biblically, at least, we are taught that we are born out of sin; Psalm 51:5 says, "Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me". This makes sex - a natural need according to science and a non-verbal form of love according to psychology, seem like a sin... if I were to believe it.
Perhaps this is just an(other) attempt by the church to make people feel guilty even from the womb so that they may establish their authority over them for the rest of their freakin life. Children are not conceived by sin, atleast in this category; they are conceived out of love, as they need to be. Love between the father and mother passed on to the child. Love formed out of trust, care and respect above anything else. These are children one 'wants to' have.
Having a job, is similar to having a child - nevertheless a want and never a need - some have it for the heck of it, some to avoid the stigma attached in the event of not having one, many have one by accident and very less for the fun of it.
We get stuck with jobs just because 'we have to' rather than take up a job 'we want to' - much like those arranged marriages many find trapped into which later one justifies to attain a state of cognitive dissonance to put up with it.
Very often, we are stuck with trophy jobs, token jobs and whatever other bastardly job comes our way in the event of not being able to find the true passion or love of our life that brings life and commitment to what we do. It is not just the person who suffers yet also a great deal of injustice done meanwhile to the job s/he holds as well.
Today, we all sell ourselves cheap. The mind especially, is always up for sale to the highest bidder. From becoming the 'other woman' in the white house to becoming a lot lizard for cheapskate punters during a hoe stroll, our opportunities seem limitless when we are not decided. Sometimes, it is not for us or for that money that we work anymore... it is perhaps just for the heck of it and for the fact that we have nothing better to do...
Here, it is all about the numbers. How many girls? - this in case it is in the North Eastern part of India, How many boys? - this applies to the rest of India. The token child in many marriages is just born out of no reason at all; with no purpose and of little value. It is like a token exchanged to evade the stigma it might bring otherwise. Born out of the duties performed connected with marriage (including having a child) and raised as a duty connected therewith thereafter. These are children one 'must' have.
Or these could also be the ones a person is pushed to have not as a matter of choice yet one that rises out of force and compulsion like in the event of a rape or as a matter of tradition (like in the case of a child born to a Devadasi). These children carry the burns and scars and the damage more than the parents. These are children one knows not 'why s/he has'.
Biblically, at least, we are taught that we are born out of sin; Psalm 51:5 says, "Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me". This makes sex - a natural need according to science and a non-verbal form of love according to psychology, seem like a sin... if I were to believe it.
Perhaps this is just an(other) attempt by the church to make people feel guilty even from the womb so that they may establish their authority over them for the rest of their freakin life. Children are not conceived by sin, atleast in this category; they are conceived out of love, as they need to be. Love between the father and mother passed on to the child. Love formed out of trust, care and respect above anything else. These are children one 'wants to' have.
We get stuck with jobs just because 'we have to' rather than take up a job 'we want to' - much like those arranged marriages many find trapped into which later one justifies to attain a state of cognitive dissonance to put up with it.
Very often, we are stuck with trophy jobs, token jobs and whatever other bastardly job comes our way in the event of not being able to find the true passion or love of our life that brings life and commitment to what we do. It is not just the person who suffers yet also a great deal of injustice done meanwhile to the job s/he holds as well.
Today, we all sell ourselves cheap. The mind especially, is always up for sale to the highest bidder. From becoming the 'other woman' in the white house to becoming a lot lizard for cheapskate punters during a hoe stroll, our opportunities seem limitless when we are not decided. Sometimes, it is not for us or for that money that we work anymore... it is perhaps just for the heck of it and for the fact that we have nothing better to do...
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