The Serpent'sTea Cup

Late into the night, I received a call from a friend of mine to announce that a common friend of ours, had just had twins - a boy and a girl. They had baked a huge double-decker cake and had celebrated the event. 

As a friend of mine once asked, 'What is the big excitement in the birth of a child(?) When a virile man and a fertile woman join, conception and birth of a new life are bound to follow... what is the big excitement about it and the need to be congratulating(?!)'

Well, I did agree to him when he told me that. But, this celebration yesterday night was different. This friend of ours was with the merchant navy; newly married, he had to return to the sea to make money for the new expenses they were starting to have. He was in the waters when he heard about his wife being pregnant. The wife had told him that she could take care of the pregnancy as his mother was with her and there was nothing to worry and all he had to do was keep working and send home the money which she promised to save on land for him. The child was born; he couldn't come. His excitement of becoming a father was saved for only the sea to witness. Two years later when he returned, he met his little boy for the first time. He was so excited that he showered all that he earned on the mother and the child. He knew that there was a lifetime ahead and the sea could meet all their needs. After a short break, they knew that he had to return to keep the home running with promises to keep as a provider. This time, it was a five-year contract that he signed. That sacrifice would be worth enough to refurnish the house, spike the bank balance and provide the little luxuries for his loved ones - he thought. He went. 

Everything went smoothly as planned and he received regular photos of new things filling the house - a new car, a new couch, a new set of jewellery... everything that would make his return to land a joy once he landed - after all his life and savings were in his good wife's good hands. 

One day, when he was still in the sea, his mother sent him an SOS and wanted to talk to him. She soon came on a video call with him and showed him the house - it seemed reduced. There was almost nothing - save for the stool left for his mother to sit and weep on. The brilliant wife had skilfully taken off with their son and every bit of investment he had made monetarily. He felt more emotionally drained than financially. He returned.

The house was empty as his mother had shown. She was being taken care of by the neighbours till his return. There was nothing. Everything purchased that he got to see only on the photos were like they never were even there; the bank balance that he was told was his savings was all saved in the woman's name. The car she drove away in, the bags she packed everything into, the child she took away... everything that she said was 'theirs', were now 'her's' to keep. Every woman who does something as vulgar as this must have a family to back her up in such a deal; in this case, it was her father stood by this angel's side - who got a case filed at the police station to keep our man at a distance and a divorce filed at the family court soon after, to seal the deal. Benefit: A daughter to take care of him in his old age with a bag full of free goodies got out of her shrewd investments made with the sweat and blood of another soul. 

When I first met this man, he had just returned from a Tea Shop. It had become his usual routine to go sit there - not for the tea - but to see his son being taken to school on that route in a closed car - who he could see only from a distance. He looked shaken, stirred and sunk - like a ship being rattled in a storm - when he narrated these incidents with his chin on his chest. 

Soon, the nasty divorce battle began; the lawyers fought over the lies, the liars fought alongside the lawyers and finally the judge for whom these battles were not fought for a reason, declared peace and granted at the end the best thing the man had ever received - a divorce. The very same evening, he got married (again) to someone much younger, more beautiful and far more healthier and started a new life cleaning up his dirty slate. This incident made me chuckle at the seaman's unpredictability. Soon, we heard that his new wife had conceived and as things were expected to naturally turnout, delivered twins - doubling his happiness - that like most men, he deserved. 

While talking to him this time, he seemed so calm and collected. He was talking about how busy he is at times that he can't answer the phone like before - times when he would be doing the dishes or changing diapers for the new lives. Life had become calm after the storm and as a sailor knows best, no matter how far a man sails into the deep, he only moves closer to his heart on land.     

On Sex, Women etc.

Three thoughts just crossed my mind...

1. On Sex: There are reports from India that state that religious groups as well as the ministry of health are for deliberating constraint in introducing decent levels of acceptable sex education in school and choosing abstinence over promoting condoms. (As usual), there is supposed unrest amongst some of the elite members of the civil society who are bold enough to reprimand this loud and clear and their jingling ensured to be heard within the limits of spaces they find comfortable and absolutely safe and hardly anywhere beyond the coffee tables where these discussions take place. Either way, there is noise regarding this factor always doing its rounds.
A few celebrities, who take time to speak something sensible and though provoking (once in a great while) on this issue mention that, humans think of sex quite frequently because evolution constantly compels them to be creative. The moment an Indian hops on to this delicious topic, s/he/it can't resist bringing in the concept of the Kamasutra like it was his/her/it's birthright to talk about it even if s/he/it has not seen a single page from it... duh! fyi, the Kamasutra maybe a handy book and is not a hand-book for sex for Indians and we all don't abide or a-bed by it. During one seminar on sex, I remember a person in the panel (who happened to be gay,) when asked by someone from the audience whether they use condoms during the act, reply without haste, "Would you eat the chocolate with the wrapper?!" Golden thoughts like these do emerge once in a while, still amidst these chuckles and often visualization, man and woman, both, ideally fantasize a good amount of their share of this creative world if thats the least they can do when they can't indulge. 
Whether the restrainers want to prevent or the liberals want laissez-faire, either way once again, whether personally one wants to refrain or indulge, humans just don't seem to find it easy to get the thought of sex out of their head (and their beds).

2. On Ugly: Of late I have been reading and viewing some terrifically horrific stories and images of unbelievable and unacceptable violence. This ranges from boko haram slicing heads of people they think are bringing in an aped-culture, bodo militants on the rampage, 10-year-old kids torturing a 3-year old child to death, maids abusing children left to their care of busy-parents who are too occupied to take care of them, gun-crazy kids turning their dad's weapon on children who would return that evening in a coffin to their parents, military abusing and stripping women in the name of searching them, raping them later and labeling anyone who resents or dissents this as 'grave internal threats and/or terrorists', war criminals who have shattered peace and harmony of thousands of families and an entire country being invited and treated with reverence by their more hideous neighbours... and all sorts of violence in the form of speech from religious to political pulpits and the irresponsible action that follows therewith and the one's who walk around without the slightest clue of these things happening around the world or perhaps don't care a damn even if they do. Life is cruel, evil and wicked too...    

3. On Women: Listening to the kind of complaints women have especially (during and after and before) pregnancy, is it just me or is there anyone else out there who thinks that they deserve better treatment(?!) Homes are ill-equipped to cater to their "needs"; they sure deserve a reservation to check into the nearest mental health clinic for better treatment to reach them... Some (most), at times, most times, don't deserve to be at home. 

p.s: Just noticed, its my thought about sex that seems to have consumed a lot of space in this post. No wonder they say, "Intelligence is anything that a Man thinks besides sex." No wonder...   

And The Woman She Is

Translation of the song "Aurat Ne Janam Diya Mardon Ko", from the movie Sadhna (1958):

"Woman gave birth to man.
And he gave her the flesh-trade
Whenever they felt like it
They trampled on her or discarded her
Woman gave birth to man

She is weighed in dinars
Or sold in open markets
She’s stripped in the court of lustful men
She’s that ill-reputed thing
Which settles among the reputed
Woman gave birth to man

Man can commit every crime
But a woman can’t even weep
Man sleeps on a million soft beds
The woman gets the funeral pyre
Man has a right to every luxury
For a woman life itself is a punishment
And it was a woman who gave birth to man

The lips which declared love
Were traded for money
The womb [from] which they were born
Was used as a business
The very body they blossomed from
[Was] abused by them
Woman gave birth to man

Men made customs which were regarded as their rights
But a woman being burnt alive was looked upon as sacrifice
Even the food given to her was considered an obligation
And to think it was a woman who gave birth to man

Every act of shamelessness is rooted in poverty
What is passion in men is a sin to woman
Woman gave birth to man

A woman is destiny of the world
But she doesn’t have it herself
She bears prophets and lord incarnates
Even then she’s considered a devil’s child
This is that unfortunate mom
Who sleeps with her own sons

For woman is the mother of man
But they gave her the marketplace
Whenever they felt like it they accepted or discarded her
And it was a woman who gave birth to man"