Thursday, November 29, 2012

Walking Past

The last couple of weeks, it has been very encouraging to walk past a few situations which otherwise would have usually made me stop and do something about it. Well rather than talk vague and not hit upon the point I shalt reveal what they were.
Episode 1: There was a crowd gathered around a young Man lying down in Bangalore. I stopped and looked. The guy had convulsion disorder a.k.a fits and someone was trying to provide him the right first aid (not the one where one hands over a key or any other iron rod) yet another was calling for an ambulance. I moved on.
Episode 2: There was this old lady... dirty, schizophrenic a.k.a mad, and longing to have water from a pot kept right outside a restaurant in Chennai. The owner and the cashier of the restaurant saw this lingering figure and shooed her off; not only did they try to scare her, they even removed the pot from there. I stopped and looked. Suddenly there was this young Man who from the shop came out with a water packet (water is sold in packets here) and gave the lady. I moved on.
Episode 3: There was an old Man trying to figure out where he could find a public telephone. He seemed like he had just got off a train and had a suitcase in hand too. Must be one of those old-timers who believes that carrying a mobile is an ingredient to constant disturbance in a rather peaceful world. But then, even an elephant slips and probably he needed to call someone badly as he seemed desperate to find the booth and now could not find one and was misguided in directions, and now he seemed desperately lost. I stopped and looked. Suddenly like it did not mean anything, a Man in the crowd slipped his mobile to him like it was the natural thing to do and the old Man took it and used it like it was all that he expected. And by the by, this happened in Chennai. 
Now, I am encouraged and am complacent to know as a witness to the proof that happened around me that I have shared that the world is moving well and for the better and it is nice to see this. It does make me feel old as I watch the young make changes which I once did wondering why there was no one else doing it and now I understand that some guy walked passed by that day too-smiling to himself with hope-like I just did today. Today I am glad that there is someone and so many to stop, listen and do something to people who cry and not let those tears dry in vain. Nevertheless, it moves...

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Instigated Movement

This is the first time I am titling the post before I wrote the content. I look around and find life in its interesting and challenging best. People are working their 'whatever' off, undercurrents of great magnitude sweep subtly underneath my 'whatever' with tension rising out of vulnerability and stress created by the survival instinct of others, I usually would care a rat's "whatever" about these issues but this time I noticed. I noticed that people can extend such sharpened, painful and pointed energy that you don't want to see and you see it so much that you are influenced by it so much that you reflect who they are and eventually see yourself becoming them. Not Good!
Everyone seems to be taking a break, wanting a break, needing a break and above all, running like hell far away... far, far away from WORK. "Never mix with your office crowd after office hours," is a good lesson i learnt from the past. Contrary to the reason why it is done, it does not actually strengthen you nor does it tighten the ties with your colleagues rather, it weakens you and makes you more vulnerable to everyone who watch you and know that you do not have anything better to do in life and with your life and just shows you are one lousy, work-dependent loner. Like I always say, "I have a wonderful home to step into where I have everything to keep me joyfully occupied and I cannot think of anything beyond that. I thank God for blessing me with such abundance. At work, it is challenging; if it is new, there are so many creepy challenges, if it is on the run, there are heaping challeneges and if it is old enough, then the challenges are still there as everything will be laid on your head expecting them to be resolved. I thank God for blessing me with those challenges and keeping me occupied without which otherwise, I might miss my family too bad." 
I just asked someone, "How far do you have to run away from work to be relaxed?" He seems to need to run away, from office. He runs far. He runs to people who he finds comforting. And away from office. We talked on it further and he asked me what I do for relaxing. I found, as I answered, that I find making a change relaxing. Small ones... though big ones are gladly accepted though not expected. People, things, situation... some change. Once I get to see that change happen, it is relaxing. It happens at home, it happens in the office, it may happen on the road, in the wilderness, in places where no one exist where I might plant a tree or in my neighbour's garden where I might help in fixing a tap... it happens in things I fix or help getting fixed and above all in relationships... to move that one inch forward toward goodness, peace and love. Manytimes and often times, the change happens within me.
For the moment, I know that I can help in making people feel good. Good about themselves and good about what they do. I can make a change by making them feel good so that they can do what they have been doing and stay good without pushing themselves too bad and pushing themselves too hard that they feel like running away. They need to know that noone else but they, can push what they are pushing as good as that. And someone needs to tell them that and thats what I do happily as it makes me happy to see them smile. And as far as getting attached to work/office is concerned, I need to detach and draw clear lines. New place, new people and I am a stranger in this land too and it is easy to drift and fall into the trap of a warm and welcoming working place... even after work. I need to walk out, meet people, make new friends and get a life and thats exactly the lesson I shall fetch from history to carry it forward to the future.
Bottomline: The key sign to a healthy life is 'movement' and it seems true to me to believe that it is the dead tree that need not move.  

Friday, November 23, 2012

A Moment Of Sanity

Today, someone gave me a bunch of his visiting cards and asked me to distribute it and spread his fame during an event. After a while, someone asked me to bring what I had written voluntarily in a random paper, re-written in a white sheet because supposedly that is how he wanted it. Someone guided me through GPS, and the other through his thoughts and yet another by matter of opinion... and everyone wondered why I could not ask for directions as I was cluelessly stuck in the middle of a traffic jam and all I wanted was help. I wondered and I couldn't help but wonder... When was the last time I was treated this bad? When was the last time I took all these bent down? When was the last time I would let anyone get away with an attempt to tune me? When was the last time I was this small? When was the last time I felt so wasted and worthless? When was the last time I felt so dead with humiliation that it did not matter that it was happening over and over again? When was the last time no one noticed?  

As I sat through some powerful words of great wisdom (and a really boring one,) shattering the bass speakers, it seems like words make no sense to me anymore. Words are huge and burdening and the actions so few. Last evening I sat listening to people unhappy about the lack of depth of the swimming pool in their appartment and today I listened to a young man who has just moved in to work at the same place whose wife had miscarried twice earlier this year mention that he has found a house to settle but with no toilet... but he was happy; happy that atleast his wife and he could be together.

What can I do? Here I am sobbing within, unable to cry. I almost choked on my way back... during that long drive. I stopped at the cafe. The young person at the counter served me what I asked without sulking. He brought me what I needed packed nicely in brown covers (noone even cared to remember the 2 of us held in an assignment who didn't have anything to eat since morning as they were busy having their plates filled...) noone cared as they got busy once gain hurrying back to listen to lectures on salvation, goodness and the glory of God. This person now at the counter seemed to care. The only one who seemed to care I witnessed the entire day. I tipped him. Tipped him more than I should and everything I could (one of my moments of sheer madness.) And he stood there without a blink and looked at me questioningly wondering if I had made a mistake. I patted him and said, "Thank you." He must have thought I was insane; little did he realize that that was the only sane moment I had had the entire day.  


Thursday, November 15, 2012

7 Vows in Indian Marriages

When it comes to Indian marriages, words like big, fat, extravagant, pomp and show come to our mind at once. However, irrespective of the style and size of the wedding, one thing that remains common in all Hindu marriages is the 'seven vows' signified by the sacred 'saat pheras' around fire or 'agni', which is one of the most imperative rituals of Indian weddings. With each 'phera' the couple makes a vow, a commitment with strong mythological roots, which is to be lived forever and more, its only then that a couple is accepted as husband and wife for the next many lives to come.

These seven vows are supposed to serve as an anchor to keep the couple going through all the ups and downs of life together, as husband and wife tied to each other in a sacred relationship.

First vow

The couple appeals to the almighty to shower blessings in the form of pure and nourishing food with a respectful and noble life. The groom pledges to provide welfare and happiness to his wife and children, whereas the bride swears to shoulder all responsibilities for the welfare of the groom's entire family.

Second vow

The groom requests the bride to be his strength so that he can provide security and protect the family with courage. The bride agrees to abide by, while demanding eternal love and undivided attention.

Third vow

The couple pleads for wisdom, wealth, and prosperity in order to live a content and satisfied life. They pledge to remain spiritually committed and the bride assures the groom that by the virtue of true love and devotion she will remain a chaste wife.

Fourth vow

The groom thanks his would-be wife for bringing auspiciousness, happiness, and sacredness in his life. In return, the bride takes an oath to serve and please her husband in every way possible. Together, they also pledge to take care and respect their elders in the family.

Fifth vow

The importance of the fifth vow is to pray for the welfare of all the living things in this Universe and begetting a noble breed. The couple also prays to almighty to bless each other's friends and family with happiness and well-being.
Sixth vow
In the sixth vow, God is invoked to bless the couple for bountiful seasons and long lived togetherness. The groom wishes that his wife would glut his life with joy and peace; while the bride provides assurance that she would participate with her husband in all his noble and divine acts.

Seventh vow

This is the last vow adding completion to the ceremony. Here the couple pleads for the long lasting relationship, enriched with understanding and loyalty. They take an oath to nourish their relationship with love and honesty and be together with each other forever not only in this life, but also in the lives to come.

Even though different religions and cultures have their own unique set of vows and different ways to perform them, the basic meaning of all remains the same 'commitment', a vow of being spiritually united as one. It is a way to assure your partner that he/she is worthy of your love and you are willing to submit, 'till death do you part'.
P.s: I did not write anything in this piece. It was a slot I read in yahoo and something I wanted to write about; So, "why reinvent the wheel?!" I wondered.